It’s a quarter til 8pm. The sun is setting, simultaneously casting a multi-colored canvas in the sky above and a shimmering glow on the water below.
My three boys are sitting on the ledge of the deck, chatting amongst themselves and enjoying the view.
I’m sitting a few feet behind them, quietly taking it all in.
That’s when an overwhelming sense of bliss rushes over me. The emotion is so powerful I can cry. For a second, everything is right in the world. Life is perfect.
Do you ever experience sparks of bliss?
I call them sparks because they are spontaneous and fleeting.
Imagine the scenario above when suddenly a mosquito bites me, or my son says something to my other son that offends him and they bicker — poof — the spark is over.
It’s like watching a movie and ending with the couple kissing and walking off into the sunset. You know that in real life, the happy ending bubble would quickly pop when one of them works too hard or doesn’t meet some expectation the other one has.
And yet, even though the feeling is quick, experiencing a spark of bliss has a lingering effect. A spark of bliss can create powerful shifts in your life and inspire the clarity you’ve been seeking. It’s a glimpse into what is working (and what isn’t). It’s often confirmation you are living in “flow” or alignment. Lastly, sparks of bliss can be “full-circle moments” reminding you where you were once and how far you’ve come.
My full-circle moment
The spark at the lake house was one of those full-circle moments for me. I recently shared a video about 10-year-mistakes. Shortly after we bought our first townhouse in 2008, the housing market crashed and our investment went down about $100,000 almost instantly. By the time we had our three kids and had outgrown our home, we were stuck.
The story we’d been raised with was: all you have to do is stay in school and get a degree and your life will be easy peasy.
Here we were, two lawyers, realizing that a law degree alone isn’t enough to solve all your money and life problems.
We were upside down in our house, had incurred credit card debt, and we weren’t making as much money as we thought we’d be making. As my father nonchalantly pointed out, we had made some mistakes — and they were 10-year mistakes.
In 2015, we sold that little townhouse and finally bought a bigger house for our expanded family. Although we had begun correcting and recovering from our mistakes, we were far from being on the other side. As often happens when you’re in a jam, it feels like you take 2 steps forward and then fall 10 steps back.
That was the year the Universe tested us in every way possible. Things got way worse before they got better and amongst all the problems we faced, my beloved father died.
Looking back, I imagine the Universe whispering, “let’s see how resilient you really are.”
The next few years became years of connecting, creating, changing, and rebuilding. It was a time of learning that joy and pain co-exist; that you can create beautiful memories and even have a lot of fun during the toughest times. It was a time of discovering our CORE as individuals, as a married couple, and as a family. And lastly, it was proof that when you live aligned with your values and priorities, make good choices, create better habits, and focus on correcting your prior mistakes — one day you wake up and realize your life is a success.
Overwhelming Gratitude
I thought about all the pieces that fell into place for us to be at this house overlooking the lake:
The realtor who suggested this place when we were looking for something else;
The fact it hadn’t been rented yet;
The owners who agreed to rent it to us just for the summer.
Being in the financial position to afford it.
A feeling of overwhelming gratitude overcame me.
I felt so lucky. And although I often affirm that I am a very lucky person, I thought of Seneca’s famous quote:
Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.
We’d been preparing for a long time. After all that we’d been through, and how far we’d come, I imagined the Universe winking and saying, “good job, kids. I knew you could do it.”
Creating bliss
I often joke that I wish I could bottle up my joy and give it to others as a pill. I used to think I was just born happier than most people.
It’s not like I haven’t had my share of trauma, heart-break, rejection, self-doubt, loss, and hardships. It’s not that I don’t experience anxiety (I do … often).
But I also often experience profound joy and happiness and these magical “sparks of bliss.”
In coaching and working with so many different people, and studying human behavior, I have started to understand that many people experience these sparks of bliss— and there are similarities on how they approach life.
These people are not exempt from problems, anxiety, or sadness — but amidst it all, they, too, live in the wonder and joy of moments of bliss.
In my personal life, I’ve noticed that the sparks increase after taking on new adventures, projects, or goals like my decluttering marathon, or RejuvaFAST.
Although you can’t force these sparks, or create them on demand, I now know that you can live a life that invites them.
And I also know that once you turn the faucet on, you can’t turn it off!
All this to say that I am following the bliss. I am paying attention because if you don’t know how to or don’t regularly experience blissful sparks, I want that for you. I can’t bottle up my joy and give it to you in pill form — but I can help you find your way to joy.
Do you want to follow the bliss with me?
Comment below or reply to my email and let me know if this resonated with you. I read all your comments and emails personally, so I look forward to hearing from you!
