On the day I was due to give birth to my first son, I was in court announcing ready for trial. Up until that point, I assumed I’d have my baby, go on maternity leave, get a nanny and go back to work.
Isn’t that what all working women did?
It all seemed so simple, until I held my first-born son in my arms.
Although I had loved being an attorney at the Public Defender’s office, the desire to be a professional with a thriving career suddenly washed away from me.
I wanted to be a mom more.
My decision to stay home with my son at that time came with consequences, including financial ones. Orlando and I had no idea how to make this work — but we decided we were willing to figure it out.
Some people questioned why I had bothered to go to law school. Had I taken out all those student loans for nothing? “What’s the point of spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on a degree you’re not going to use?”
THE POWER OF HAVING CHOICES
I’d smile and tell them I went to law school to have the choice to practice law—and also the choice not to.
One son became three sons, and although I eventually chose to practice law again, I never went back to work for someone else.
Without realizing it then, motherhood turned me into an solopreneur.
I remember feeling back then that becoming a stay at home mom was taking me off my career path. But I realize now that choosing to do things your way are not deviations from path, rather awakenings of the soul—tiny acts of courage that prepare you for something bigger.
Turns out I was never going to practice law long-term anyway. Life led me to find my true calling and purpose, being a life coach who inspires people to live happier, healthier and more meaningful lives.
Today, on Mother’s Day, as I reflect on all the choices I’ve made and the life I’ve lived since I became a mom, I am deeply grateful that I followed my intuition and did things my way.
MOMENT OF CLARITY
We often get stuck on who we “are” rather than focusing on the choices we get to make.
Throughout your life you may become many different things. Rather than view identities and labels as boxes that define and contain you, see each of them as one of the many buildings you’ll inhabit, decorate to suit your tastes, and either stay in or move on from.
No one can take the skills, experience, and knowledge you’ll acquire away from you—and you get to define how you’ll apply them to realize your next creation.
Choose the next right thing for you—regardless of what others may tell you and despite any doubts about whether or not you’re supposed to.
You are not locked into a path just because you started down it. You have the choice to change your choices. The question is, will you have the courage to do so?
CONNECT WITH CARO Featuring Tom Harari
Tom Harari was faced with a similar challenge when he became a father 2 1/2 years ago. After spending a decade building technology startups and raising capital with VC’s, he decided his fast-paced life would no longer serve him in his new role as a dad.
If you haven’t heard about Tom, he is a writer, entrepreneur, and investor. He holds an MBA from MIT. Tom writes a weekly newsletter called The Soloist exploring ideas around self-employment, creation, and living an intentional life.
I learned about him when my husband shared a powerful post he wrote on the 38 lessons he’d teach his 18 year old self.
This post went viral on Twitter and for good reason! Join us on May 16th at noon to discuss the exploration of concepts related to self-employment, courage, and leading a purposeful existence.
